You and your partner have decided to separate. You feel that is the best route for the two of you as adults, and in the long term, it will be best for the children. Wait, what about the children now though?
This is likely the most uncertain time your children have faced in their lives. The stability of a unified family unit, no matter what was going on, is now being disrupted. Your children look to you for guidance and support, in all aspects of their lives. Parents are their cornerstone and now that is being ripped in two and the uncertainty of what’s to come, and what their family structure will look like going forward, can be daunting and overwhelming. The children may be feeling that these fundamental changes are not something that they had asked for and may feel that this divorce was somehow their fault.
Children need to be assured their lives will remain as stable as possible, just with separate homes and with two parents that love them very much. The most important things to think about when making parenting decisions are:
It is important to keep age-appropriate communication lines open with your children about the situation. But there are “no-no” topics in which children should be shielded at all costs. Those include:
It is important to keep open, civil, and cordial communication with the other parent. Your children need to come first. There was a time in your relationship when the two of you had feelings strong enough to want to create your child(ren). Now, your job is to guide them through this life-changing transition. Remember, you did not agree upon EVERY decision when you were an intact family, so try to keep reasonable expectations about how you will navigate difficult decisions post separation.
Our family law attorneys have decades of experience in assisting families facing all types of issues through the creating of a Parenting Plan or, if necessary, presenting the necessary evidence to a Judge to determine the best interests of your family’s needs.