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How Much Do Children Need to Know About Divorce?
It’s important for parents to have the divorce conversation with their kids. This can be difficult, but it’s often best for both parents to sit down with their children and have a family conversation about what the future is going to look like.
That said, how much do you actually need to tell them? It may feel like this is a very adult conversation, especially with young kids. What do they need to know?
Age and maturity
All children are different, so parents need to make this determination on an individual basis. Two of the main things to consider are the age and maturity of their children.
For example, a very young child may need to know that their parents are going to split up, but they don’t need to know why it’s happening. Maybe one partner had an extramarital affair. A parent may decide that they want to tell their teenager about that affair so that they understand the family dynamics, but there’s no reason for young children to know because they don’t really understand these types of relationship issues.
Often, the key is to focus on talking about the things that will affect the child directly. Where will they live? Which parent will be in charge of them? Who will make decisions on their behalf? Are they going to have to move? What parts of their life are still going to be the same after the divorce? Parents don’t always need to get into the specifics of the adult details, but they should take their time to talk over the things that matter most to the kids.
Having these conversations is just one step when moving toward a divorce. Parents who are splitting up need to understand their parental rights, their custody rights and all the legal steps they should take while working through this process.
CONTACT: Aislynn Thomas McDonald
PHONE: (305) 503-0850
EMAIL: athomasmcdonald@kelleykronenberg.com
About Aislynn Thomas-McDonald and Kelley Kronenberg
It’s important for parents to have the divorce conversation with their kids. This can be difficult, but it’s often best for both parents to sit down with their children and have a family conversation about what the future is going to look like.
That said, how much do you actually need to tell them? It may feel like this is a very adult conversation, especially with young kids. What do they need to know?
Age and maturity
All children are different, so parents need to make this determination on an individual basis. Two of the main things to consider are the age and maturity of their children.
For example, a very young child may need to know that their parents are going to split up, but they don’t need to know why it’s happening. Maybe one partner had an extramarital affair. A parent may decide that they want to tell their teenager about that affair so that they understand the family dynamics, but there’s no reason for young children to know because they don’t really understand these types of relationship issues.
Often, the key is to focus on talking about the things that will affect the child directly. Where will they live? Which parent will be in charge of them? Who will make decisions on their behalf? Are they going to have to move? What parts of their life are still going to be the same after the divorce? Parents don’t always need to get into the specifics of the adult details, but they should take their time to talk over the things that matter most to the kids.
Having these conversations is just one step when moving toward a divorce. Parents who are splitting up need to understand their parental rights, their custody rights and all the legal steps they should take while working through this process.
CONTACT: Aislynn Thomas McDonald
PHONE: (305) 503-0850
EMAIL: athomasmcdonald@kelleykronenberg.com